'The Devourer' Approves

While traveling I think people are mainly scared of three vastly different things: bathroom situations, language barriers and food. As you probably know I've spouted off quite a few words on the toilet subject already (revisit those entries here and here). I think we all know where I stand on that. As for language I don't have much to say, mostly because my Bahasa Melayu is still in a pitiful state. Plus, so many people and places in S.E. Asia speak English that wandering about round these parts is largely a breeze. Unfortunately, I'm too American for my own damn good. I can't learn a second language for jack squat. But I did take my first language lesson a few nights ago, so we'll see how that goes.

When all three of these issues collide that's when I think folks can really freak out. Just running the possibilities through one's head can get people's pits sweaty and their reservations ramped up about visiting novel locales. Apprehension quickly sets in. These three topics spook people into staying at home.

But it's all for naught. In my opinion, the toilets of the Malay archipelago are superb, people love it when you chit-chat or crack lame jokes in broken Bahasa, and the food is delectable. The cuisine over here has kept me constantly saying my favorite phrase: “satu lagi,” which means one more. Yes, I'll have one more portion of beef rendang, one more pulled tea, one more nasi lemak, wrapped in its tell-tale banana leaf. Why of course I'll have another skewer of chicken satay and grilled veggies, make it five actually. And don't forget to drizzle it all in peanut sauce.

I'm no hoity-toity gourmand. I just get a huge kick out of scarfing food. My reputation as “the closer” has even followed me to Malaysia. During summer camp, which just took place, I even picked up a new nickname: "the devourer," which has quite the nice ring to it, in a sarcastic, horror movie kind-of-way.

Luckily food is everywhere out here: restaurants abound, street stalls flourish in hectic cities, and in most villages you can plop down at a plastic table in someone's yard and eat a meal. Maybe even watch “Iron Man” with their son while you slurp your noodles too loud. Enough of trying to describe the scene out here in paragraph form. Let's have the pictures and, I hope, the humorous captions do the job for me.

Mee Bandung, one of my favorites from over here. Coincidentally the best version I've had hails from Juara. I try it everywhere, but it's never as tasty as here. Mee is noodles and Bandung is a city on the Indonesian island of Java. The noodle bowl is slightly sweet with crushed peanuts, veggies, an egg, chunks of chicken and squid, and fresh lime all dancing together. *** All photos can be enlarged by clicking them.***

The precision squeeze is key! Dani loves it too. I put her on game with this one. Mee Bandung is like the mole (delicious Mexican chocolate cinnamon chile sauce) of S.E. Asia. When it's on I can't get enough and nothing tastes better, but when it falters, and it usually does, it don't taste too good.

What else can I say about dude, I gets bizzay.

Bakso, an Indonesian staple found everywhere: from street vendors and roadside markets, on bicycles and at airports. It's like French Onion soup with veggies, spice and usually beef or chicken meatballs. The quality of the dish and meat vary, but just like Mee Bandung, when it's on point the taste is a doozy.

Three classics on the Juara eating scene (from left to right): crispy, deep-fried squid (one of the only times in life dipping things in mayonnaise is acceptable), spicy sambal chicken and veggie curry. Sambal is a sweet chile sauce packing flavor and heat. I dig it even if it induces hiccups often.

Gado-gado, another Indonesian go-to. I translate that to “whatever tasty veggies you got in peanut sauce.” We've had it with noodles, rice, boiled egg, tempe, or tofu. One translation we saw on a menu read “Peanut Sauce Salad.” That doesn't do this one justice.

The ubiquitous Nasi Lemak wrapper. You can find these mini-pyramids gracing many Malaysian tables in the morning. Do yourself a favor and eat like three. I do.

First, unwrap the banana leaf to get a solid look at what's inside: coconut rice, anchovies, sambal sauce, peanuts and usually, but not from this one, egg.

Second, take your right hand and get busy. Spread that sambal around. Don't think too much about it. The anchovies in it are salty morning morsels. Don't pick 'em out, these miniature fishes know what they're doing.

Third, consume with gusto. It's one of the classic Malaysian breakfasts, but feel free to chow down a couple at nighttime, in your hotel room, while your girlfriend looks at you oddly, judging your audacious appetite. I bet she wouldn't use that adjective.

You can score some serious Indian food in Malaysia and Singapore. On this journey we discovered butter chicken (top right corner). The sad part was that it took 28 years to first eat it.

Daniel behind a roadside Soto Ayam (chicken stew) stand in Bali, whipping us up a few bowls. I feel like this photo would give a Maricopa County AZ health inspector a heart attack. Peep the dangling chickens.

The finished product: rice, veggies, eggs, noodles, crushed onions, broth, spices and chicken. They don't waste no chicken here. You get bone, liver, chewy chunks, feet and whatever else was on the blade before they tossed it into your bowl.

Nasi Goreng Ayam. Another classic. It's either rice or noodles (or both) mostly every day out here. Feeling down about just plain fried rice? Top it up with some fried chicken. No matter where you go in Malaysia and Indonesia there will always be fried chicken available and, yes, it will always be yummy. These countries know how to fry.

Izzati, you got caught! Tom Yum chock full of veggies and fried squid. Double meal - take it to the stage!

Shaving ice for two classic Malaysian beverages. I bet some hipster in San Diego has this machine and on Wednesdays they make local-infused gin slushies with it. Probably sprinkles them with basil grown off their bike trailers.

On the left we have ABC, which contrary to stereotype (based on color) is not the Lady's favorite drink. Her go-to is Cendol, on the right and filled with coconut milk.

ABC all mixed up and ready to give you a brain freeze. The shaved ice goes with sweetened condensed milk, rosewater, sugary jelly-rice doo-dads, corn and kidney beans. Trust me, the corn and beans hold their own. For me those kidney beans not only are delicious, but provide a stream of fiber in a sea of diabetes.

Malaysia makes lovely drinks. One pet peeve of mine is that any beverage ordered-to-go comes in a plastic bag. I hate it. It's like getting an IV drip to sip on.

Malaysian kue, which are various pastries and gelatinous sweet treats. Sometimes rice is thrown in. Here we got a few takeaway ones, which I have already started to nibble on. I like the slimy green ones.

Izzati whipping up some Fishnet Roti at JTP. Roti is bread in Bahasa. I give her an A for presentation and style.

The rotis all rolled up, tiny airy pancake-esque nubbins that get dipped in curry sauce. Alli can eat like 10 of 'em. I've seen it.

Chocolate sweetened condensed milk. Like whoa! My consumption of this canned milk is already 478% more than when we were in the States. Finding this special can (the only time I've seen a chocolate one) on our scuba liveaboard in Komodo made for a splendid day.

Drizzling it on freshly-fried banana doughnut balls. From this session alone I think I created three cavities. Worth it? We'll see what my dentist bill is when I return to the U.S.

Alli around our spread on the liveaboard. Our cook never did anything fancy, but that didn't stop him from whipping up the best meals we had in all of Nusa Tenggara (Komodo, Flores and all those other forgotten islands east of Bali). We got chicken, noodles, three veggie dishes and bomber Flores mangoes.

Glutinous sticky rice in a bamboo log, which serves as its pot. You line the bamboo in banana leaf, shove lots of rice inside and cook it over the fire. This is what you call magic rice. You can eat it plain it's so tasty.

Izzati modeling a bamboo full of said glutinous rice.

Now time for some fruits: red pineapple.

Massive jackfruit growing right off the road in Juara. At special occasions here (weddings, engagement parties and Hari Raya) folks make jackfruit curry, a favorite of ours. The fruit is meaty and filling.

Sackful of durian! I've already blogged about these exquisite fruits here, but just to reiterate they are quite a bonus to living here. This old rice bag was filled with around 20 durians and in one day the small JTP staff ate 'em all.

We also were lucky enough to have Izzati make durian glutinous rice dessert. She turned the durian fruit into a creamy concoction with a texture similar to clam chowder, but don't think savory, think sweet, sweet jungle fruit.

Locally made banana bread by Alli. We had one bushel of easily over 100 bananas at JTP so she made lots of bread and all I contributed was my stomach space.

This is like the fourth photo of me hovering over food. I didn't get the name “the closer” for nothing. “Typical” Alli just muttered.

Babi guling! Aka suckling pig prepared in a variety of ways served all at once. A Balinese speciality.

Pork explosion: satay, fried skin (so greasy and good!), roasted belly and another mystery side we can't remember. It was pork though. And incredible. We even snuck some onto the plane on our way out of Bali.

Kek lapis from Sarawak, Malaysian Borneo. It's dense layer cake. Alli didn't like it, but I was a fan. Sadly this Oreo flavor tricked me as it was bland as can be. But the other ones I ate were lovely, especially the Milo one.

Sometimes you just have to consume a weird chicken bun on the public bus taking you to the Cat Museum (see here!).

Bun creeper. So steamy.

Kopi ice in Maluku! Beverages are big over here so I like to stop constantly and drink them, preferably strong coffee ones with lots of milk and sugar. While Indonesia has lots of robust black coffee I have developed a weak spot for the sweet. Alli is concerned I'm getting into Type 2 territory.

Malukan kue! Another yellow gelatinous cake, crispy brown sugar rice squares and a rice roll stuffed with salted fish and peanuts. A plate of these with your morning joe never hurt nobody.

In case you're worried Coca-Cola contains pork products they have a way of reassuring you.

I said I love beverages, especially fresh mango ones at the base of the Gunung Lukon volcano in northern Sulawesi.

A Sunday feast! We have a plate of roasted and fried pork, BBQ satay and cap cay veggies (fried in oyster sauce). And yes, a big bowl of rice too.

Lost in translation? This was the Ice Cream Sundae we ordered. A little bit of sundae, mixed in with shaved ice and fruit cocktail. No fudge or chocolate sauce, but that wafer stick thing was tasty.

Switching gears at the end of the blog here. This is not from SE Asia, but from Kathmandu, Nepal. Alli and I really dig the Asian breakfast (seriously - rice, hot sauce and egg is wondrous) but after over a year in Asia the American breakfast at our hotel blew our minds. Consider me patriotic, but all the six mornings I spent in this vibrant city started off with this plate. So simple and tasted just like home.

Yeah buddy.

If you read the post about things we miss then you know we were jubilant to see “Mexican” on that sign. They might have thrown some Nepali curry powder into the refried beans, but that didn't matter. The fajitas were huge and sizzling, and they actually came with “real” tortillas. Well, real enough.

Welcome to Asia where even the felines enjoy a bowl of rice for dinner. R.I.P. Bucket, you were a jolly jungle cat and would eat anything.

Almost One Year In (Part Two): Things We Miss

People by nature are creatures of habit. My piles of print media in any abode I've ever lived in can attest to this. After being gone so long (11 months and counting now) from our normal, everyday lives they're quite a few things Alli and I pine for that we can't find here. Or if they can be found, it's rare or just not the same.

The following is quite food heavy and, yes, obviously we miss family and friends, duh. This is actually the hardest part of being gone, missing people. This list is in addition to everyone we miss. I ranted on in my post from yesterday (found here) about a hodge podge of things Alli and I are glad to be done with in Asia, but below it's exactly the opposite. This list is comprised of things we would have loved to have on many occasions. For example, if Mexican food could stand up to international shipping conditions we would have asked for that care package many months ago.

It might not be a burrito but Kenny and I were pretty pumped for our Sonoran hot dogs in Cozumel, Mexico in Dec. 2011. Fry everything up! * All photos can be enlarged by clicking on 'em.

Burritos
I didn't think these Mexican staples would be so hard to say goodbye to. Southern Arizona, and obviously our neighbor Sonora, has some impeccable food: sweet pork tacos, greasy lard-filled tortillas, carne asada, tortas, the list goes on and on. But the standard burrito is sorely missed. This was Alli and I's go-to food: before the lab for her, on the way to track Gila monsters for me, and a cure-all hangover grease bomb for the both of us. Not to mention many a cheap dinner date. Yes, we've both separately had food fantasies about scarfing burros.

Live Music
I've always had a weakness for blowing money I didn't have on concerts. And I'll never regret that. Whether it was for bigger names like George Clinton or the Fleet Foxes, or one of the plentiful kick-ass local shows Tucson had on the regular it was well worth it (shout out to Scrilla Gorilla!), especially now that our live music attendance has ceased. I'd give anything to get on down and have the opportunity to throw my back out again. But I don't think Yo La Tengo or Big Boi will be playing Sulawesi anytime soon.

Sometimes it's hard for Alli and I to look at this photo cause there's just too much tasty cheese on it. If only it was simple to make homemade pizza with goat cheese, mozzarella and pancetta on it when traveling.

Cheese
Self-explanatory. You just can't find it here often. Processed American cheese slices don't count. That's like saying you miss hearing rock 'n' roll and then someone says "Hey, listen to this!" while handing you a Nickelback CD.

If you can't tell Alli (and myself) were quite excited for this bag 'o' pizza "topping" we found in Kuching, Malaysian Borneo. We even made an elaborate pasta since the cabin we were staying at had a kitchen. Unfortunately after checking the ingredients docket, we found out 49% or so of this "topping" was filler, and what was in that filler, we do not know. Probably sheep's grease or something else utterly appetizing.

Bicycling
I pedaled Blue Boogie all over Tucson. When I got my sweet bike trailer I was then able to cart around caged snakes, small pieces of furniture, cases of beer, even our cat Polly. While we had motorbikes at the turtle project on Tioman it just ain't the same. Juara's the perfect size for a couple of bitchin' road bikes and hopefully when we return this spring Alli and I will be rocking 'em. And if we're lucky the salty sea air won' t turn them into creaky piles of rust too soon (see entry below).

Noah and I looking fresh to def before the last Urban Assault Ride Alli and I participated in before we left for SE Asia. Team Tie Die! Tornado tore it up. And Noah, we all still know you should have won that mustache contest.

Periodicals
A daily newspaper? Nope, but that's also because I'm way too American and don't know any other languages beside English. Magazines? A slightly overpriced National Geographic here and there, but I wasn't desperate enough yet to fork over $20 USD for a New Yorker. Time will tell.

Moments like this for me are unfortunately few and far between.

Refried and Black Beans
Slathered in a chimichanga, topped with cheese or straight out the tin in the field, I don't hate. Every time Alli and I wander into a supermarket we always check the appropriate isle, thinking, maybe this one place will smile down on us. I'm not one for dreaming of canned food, but Amy's Refried Black Beans have caused this. I think we're both going to ask our parents to ship some out. No joke.

Granola & Yogurt
This entry was a surprise to me. When Alli and I had one of our first conservations about what we missed, this popped out my mouth. Obviously the headiest, most crunchy hippie entry on the list, but tasty granola was always one of my favorite snacks. They have yogurt out here, but it's mostly a cup of sugar with a splash of yogurt. I might as well eat a doughnut instead. 

Not only am I raising the roof cause I dig living in the desert, but also because all the clothes I'm wearing in this photo are mold and rust free. Full journalistic disclosure: this desert here is Joshua Tree National Park. I never actually lived there. I did live in a city called Tucson, about five hours to the east though.

Mold & Rust Free Stuff
Living in the desert has its perks: ample sunshine, sexy sunsets, Tiger rattlesnakes, Sonoran hot dogs, and never having your possessions fall victim to mold or rust. To say it can be quite humid out here is an understatement. Almost all of my shirts, a few boxers and my favorite shorts already have accumulated an impressive abstract art display of mold. A few of the shirts look like a demonic kid sat down with a ballpoint pen, setting up the perfect game of connect the dots. Even my miniature medical kit and Alli's copy of David Quammen's Song of the Dodo are gathering mold. Being constantly sweaty doesn't help the cause. Rust is a steady creeper too, brandishing its image on my fingernail clippers, and book bag and fanny pack zippers.

Living on the ocean and up against the steamy, humid jungle (throw in some tropical rain too) does a number on your belongings. As I'm going to press the latest casualty of mine to bite it is the bathing suit I'm wearing in this photo. Mold is running rampant everywhere inside 'em. And it's too bad you can't zoom in better to the water pump I'm lugging out here, there was so much rust on this thing it was just one colossal tetanus infection waiting to happen. FYI: We're changing Jo's tank, the blind Green sea turtle that resides at JTP, in this photo. That's Alli up ahead with the hose.

Fresh Mushrooms
Too often it's the can variety out here, especially on Tioman. They don't even compare. I never knew it before I left the states but I'm a big fresh fungi fan. When you do find it in SE Asia it's yummy, especially the white fungi they sauté up in oyster sauce. But those canned shrooms are always lurking in the shadows, ready to jump into my fried rice or noodles, or even worse, trying to front like they're okay to be in fresh pasta.

Canned mushrooms all up in my spaghetts.

My Own Personal Coffee Maker
Sometimes I just wanna do it all by myself. One of my favorite morning rituals was grinding beans and brewing 'em up. I just can't get in the zone like I used to. Once in awhile I can do it when we're traveling, but it's not the same. I don't think any other guests want to see a grown man making coffee while singing Prince's "Take Me With U" in the kitchen commons. Some people just don't appreciate Prince's funky jams enough in the A.M.

While I take my afternoon Milo making very seriously, it just doesn't compare to making a strong cup of black coffee in the morning.

I figured I'd end another blog with a jolly Alli and her afternoon tea. This cup was enjoyed on the deck of our homestay, right outside Gunung Mulu National Park, Sarawak, Malaysian Borneo.